carpedick

Ok, so yesterday started out sucking. I found out that more transactions had gone through before I had a chance to cover them by making a deposit, which amounted to about $63 in overdraft charges. This totally sucked….however…

Later on that night I get a frantic call from my mom that I need to come over. I come over, and there ya have it, they gave us a check for the car, for the amount that it helped them save in taxes, $1000….sweet…then today I go in to deposit that and Jason’s paycheck, and find that his tax refund has been deposited, another 200 or so dollars, super sweet, and then in a week or so we’re supposed to be getting our money back from the dealers…mega super sweet. So, right now we’re up by about $1700. Now we have more than enough money for our trip to Arizona, I was worried there for a bit. Anyways, catch ya on the flip side….ta ta…

ok, so last night was vicious….it all started with Derek coming over. Jason tells me that he’s coming over “real quick” to iron his clothes for going out tonight. This turns into Derek coming in, watching a little tv, then starting to make dinner, then going into our bathroom to shave his legs. DOES THE BOY NOT HAVE A FREAKIN HOME!!?!?!?!….WTF, who comes over to their friends house and shaves their legs, especially when he was supposed to iron and get the fuck out. It’s soooooo annoying. The next time Jason says he’s coming over, I’m telling him that I don’t want him to, it’s too much hassle. Especially since every time he comes over it’s a constant reminder that he owes us over $1000 and doesn’t seem to give a crap about paying us back. I.E. always commenting on having enough money to go to SF or buying something new or whatever.

Anyways, so that led into Jason and I having a big ole fight, talking about leaving and whatnot. It’s a combination of frustrations really. His frustration over wanting to go out and me either not wanting to or us not having the extra money, or my frustration over him continuously asking to go out and then having to explain the same reasons over and over again and him getting pissy at me because of something that I can’t control.

It’s really a common theme in all our fights, usually due to the fact that I’ve given him a reason for something and he gets upset over and over about it, and the reason never changes and 9 times out of 10 it’s a damn good reason, and usually out of my control and none of this seems to change him getting pissy at me. It also didn’t help that he asked me if we could go out again last night, when he knows very well that he doesn’t give a crap what I say. If he asks if we can go out he means if he can go out and if I want to tag along that’s fine. And I keep asking him, why even ask me if the question isn’t about us, if it’s just about me and you’re going to do what you want to do regardless. And then he gets all pissy and tells me, I’m being a dick. I don’t think so, I’m just asking for some common decency, treat me like I’m not stupid, or at least recognize WTF you’re doing.

Anyways, everything ended up coming out ok in the end, we rearranged some furniture in the living room to give us a little more ease in moving around. Then this morning, after me asking him to come to bed early, and me falling asleep, I find out that he was up till 230 talking online. Then he has the nerve to tell me that he only talked to 2 of his friends. I’m sorry, but 2 hours online, is hardly filled by talking to 2 people, to stay on that long requires talking to multiple people and surfing considerable websites. It’s just annoying that he can’t just come out and be honest with me. It’s like he doesn’t even realize that when I get pissed off about stuff like this, which then causes him to be even more recluse about telling me the truth, that it’s not the fact that he chatted with someone, it’s the fact that he fuckin lied about it.

Anyways, today is kinda slow, the whole war thing is already boring, with news reports going on all day long, just reiterating the same thing over and over again, just in different orders and with occasional new facts thrown in here and there. Chat more later…

I have been horrible about updating this thing and I’m sure as hell never going to get anyone interested in my life if I keep skipping out on it. I feel bad though, cuz every time I look at my friends journal it’s always so interesting and fun to read and mine just seems pitiful by comparison, even though he’s about the same age as me. I guess it’s cuz he was still single until not too long ago and since he lives at home and has tons more money to do stuff with. Who knows maybe someday I could get lucky enough to be in a situation like that.

Dang and I just remembered that this past Saturday I wanted to go out and I didn’t even think about asking him, not that it would’ve been required since he seems to be at Faces every week.

Anyways, not to go off on a tangent, but the fact is that things have been going ok. Jason and I got officially Domestically Partnered in December and since then things have been about the same. We were stressing for a few months, because Jason quit his job at Subways at the opportunity to start at Verizon, through a local temp agency. The temp agency flaked out and he was left for a while with no job and no income and was finding it hard to get anything. When he finally did end up getting something it was a crap job through a “Advertising Firm”. I use that term very loosely since it was basically door to door sales, commission based only. All of this was not told to him for quite a while. He found out about the door to door thing pretty quickly, but the commission based wasn’t revealed until about 2 weeks into the process. Needless to say he quit that job and moved on to try and find something else. Finally he did, he now works at Coco Moka in front of Macy’s DTP. ::gasp:: a gay boy working at Macy’s?!?! whoda thunk. So things are going good for him there and it seems to be working out in a good way. They’re even talking about promoting him and having him manage a new store in SD. But who knows where that’ll end up.

right now I’m kinda bummed, cuz I just found out that we got turned down for financing on the new rings that we wanted to pick up. One of which I’ve been drooling over for years, but I guess I’ll have to wait on that one for a little while. Hafta save up some money for a bit.

One of the funniest things that happened of late was when Jason told me about the fact that one of his friends who works at Destination Sacramento told him that Matt, my ex that works there, had told her not to talk to him. How weird is that? She told J and told Matt that Jason’s a great guy and that since Matt doesn’t even know Jason that he shouldn’t talk out of his ass. I thought it was hilarious that the boy is still hung up on that whole thing. It’s sad really when you think about it.

But alas that is all I have. I’ll put a link to this from my main page so I can start actually making sure to update it daily, or at least more often then currently. Catch y’all later…

I’ve been noticing that work tends to go in real spurts here. At times it seems like I’m really busy, and other times like now, I find myself screwing around all day. Which I hate, but it’s like, if they’re not going to give me anything to do, then what am I supposed to do. Oy, it’s frustrating, anyways it’s the end of the day and time for me to head out. Nite

Ok, so a lot has happened. The main thing, we moved, oy hectic. We do this far to often, I think this is the 10th time for me since I moved out of the house 8 years ago.

Anyways, so we’re in capitol towers, on the 9th floor, it’s nice, definitely different. It’s interesting to see the reactions of people. Most older folks know the name, but younger folks rarely know what it is. I guess it used to be prestigious, in a way, I think it’s just a change from the normal downtown life. It’s nice to be in a place that is in the downtown/midtown area, but has the professionalism and feel of a full fledge apt complex, rather than the little one, run by a manager or an owner, where to get anything done is a miracle. And dreams of sheet rock walls and ceilings that are straight, are purely far off dreams…

Well, we like the 9th floor thing, it’s different and fun. And we’re almost fully unpacked, just have some organizing to get the last of the bins out on the balcony.

Oy, ok, over the last couple weeks life has been hectic. We weren’t sure if we were moving out, because the owner was threatening to sue, then he gave us an option to pay one months rent in exchanged for being released from the lease, but then he wouldn’t take payments, and wouldn’t take the money out of the deposit, so we were getting frustrated. I started to do my research and spoke with a lawyer or two and realized that we had rights too. It turns out that since he was trying to rent out the apt for 995 instead of the 795 that he was getting from me, that he wasn’t performing a good faith effort to mitigate his losses and rerent the apt. So, now he has lowered the rent to 895 after not renting it out. We left the place spotless and in way better condition then when we got it, and we have pictures to prove it. So, we’re hoping the guy doesn’t do anything, but if he does we have a few arguments on our side. Should be interesting.

Also in the move, Jason got another hernia.. A small one, but one that he happened to mention to his boss, who then mentioned it to the staffing firm, who said that he couldn’t work until he got it checked out, and the doctor signed off on it. Well, we don’t have the money for that, which means he is forced not to work, which put us in financial strains extraordinaire. $600 less a month is a lot, when it comes to making the 400+ car payment and car insurance payments. So, we started scrambling for cash, trying to find him another job where they didn’t know about the hernia. Selling off my coins, my old toys, borrowing money, working for my parents, and we managed to do all this. And then on top of that found out that we could skip a car payment, so we’re that much better off there now, so we have even more room to move. We’ll probably end up paying it, since we’ve made up the money, and apparently Jason’s boss is allowing him to work, just not to stress himself or lift anything heavy. So all in all it sounds good.

I think that’s pretty much it…we’ve found that there are good parking spots and bad parking spots around this complex on the street. The bad ones, are when you park and you see white spots literally covering the ground. We made the mistake once, and ended up with a car covered with birdshit. We now have a few damaged paint spots because of some bird crap that was on too long. It sucks…but oh well.

Well, I’ll update more later, or hopefully sooner….cya

Ok, so I was going to confront Derek, but opted to give him a note that spelled out our complaints, and let him argue them if he felt the need. We opted to give him the ultimatum that if he ever let anyone smoke inside the house again, that he would pay for the couch to be cleaned, rather than have him pay a portion now. I know, I know…aren’t we nice.

The other items were as follows:

Never have anyone over and up that late again (5 am), since both J and myself were unable to sleep until all the noise quieted down.

Stop drinking my nonfat milk. His doctor told him to drink 4 cups a day to put on some weight. Doesn’t make much sense though since my milk is nonfat and won’t help weight gain.

Stop eating our food unless he decides to give us food money or pay us back, since the food we have is the food we have for the rest of the month, and when it goes, we no eatie.

And lastly, (this came up as we came home from something else) turn off the freakin lights. Left on the living room lights again, with the curtains wide open. (yes, hello is this 976-thief, no one is at my home, wanna see if we have anything you like?)

I doubt he’ll respond, just like last time, but at least I’ll have the satisfaction of knowing I got it off my chest. However, I’ve come to the conclusion that all words spoken from me to him will be in letter form. Since, god knows what his mood will be from day to day and whether he’ll pull an attitude or not when something is said to him.

Last, J and I went to my friend Linda’s house last night. In case I didn’t mention it before, her brother was killed in south sac on Friday the 8th. The guy stole his car, but admitted to police that he shot him because her brother was gay. Messed up. More messed up is the fact that Matthew Shepard and some little cross dressing queen get more media play than her brother because her brother is older, and I think the world likes to abhor violence against teens and young folks, while violence against older folks is less interesting. I’m going to bring up this at the meeting at Lambda this week. Even though technically I’m too old to be there, I feel it’s an issue worth mentioning. And hopefully I can get some information for my friend, so she can have some legal support, or whatever she may need.

Oh, sorry, one more thing, just talked to my cousin. I haven’t mentioned him before, but his name is Dakota (Kody for short). Both J and I, myself for longer, have thought that he was gay. You tell me. He’s 17 almost 18, brown hair (bleached), skinny (as tall as me, and probably 140 or 150), dances (semi-professionally), is effeminate in his likes and dislikes, and to date I’ve never seen him with a girlfriend of any sort. I’m not trying to say that he is gay for sure, but I’ve suspected it. And it’d be cool to have another gay family member, since I’m the only one right now. And out of all of them, he’d be the one that I’d pick. However, since I used to hang out with him when I and he were younger, god knows what the family would say if he came out. They’d probably think I’d molested him. Anyways, FYI, in case I mention him in the future.

K, I’m out, time to wait for J to pick me up…..grrrr.

Why? …., ok, I’ll start at the beginning

11 pm last night, wait…before that…

8 pm, Jason and I start talking about doing the dishes and start doing them a few moments later. Derek still never once offers to help. I don’t think the boy is every going to grow up and be mature. You’d think a sense of responsibility would kick in somewhere.

That got me off on a bad foot. Add to that, that 2 days prior, he ate 1/2 of the cookie dough that was remaining, which would come out to about 1/2 a lb. What a pig.

Ok, so 11 pm, Jason, Derek, and I go to UPS. We’re interested in making some extra money and the workout can’t hurt, not to mention the benefits sound great, and the hours work with my current schedule. We go through the tour and J and I have interviews set up for Monday. Cool.

We come home, relax and head to bed. Derek leaves at some point. The next thing I know, I hear him and his friends that he brought over watching a movie, this was around 2 am. I then spend the next 3 hours tossing and turning while he alternates between the movie, laughing loud, talking loud, and playing a vide gam, Frequency, should I ever meet the inventor of the game he will die. Around 5, I hear him leave, and still hear the game going. I figure it’s rotating through a title screen and go to turn it off. Before I walk into the living room I see one of his friends on the couch, playing the game, so I veer off into the bathroom. Wait a few….then go back to the bedroom, and tell Jason that I just smelled smoke in the living room. Cigarette smoke. I want to confront him when he gets back, so when I hear him come in and go into the bathroom, I start to head out and catch him just as he’s getting out of the bathroom. I ask him about the smoke, and he nonchalantly answers, “oh yeah, we had the door open”, so I ask, “Was he smoking outside?”, he says, “No, he was inside, but we had the door open”, imagine the last part with a slight inflection, as though the door being open should’ve solved the problem, so he didn’t see why I was upset. Now, tonight he will know why I was upset. I woke up in the morning, with 3 whole hours of sleep, and smelled the couch, I could still smell the smoke, not much, but enough. Tonight I’m going to advise him of the fact that that is never to happen again, and that in the future he will pay for the entire cleaning of the couch. This time, since we were planning on doing it pretty soon anyways, he will only pay half. Since we will have to have it cleaned prior to when we were planning on it.

Is it so hard to ask people to be responsible? It seems like some people can’t grasp the concept. I just don’t get it….

I was goin’ somewhere with J in a car I dont’ know how we got. I was talking with a friend, Mike, on the computer near a bunch of police officers and he was telling me about how he had a device, not thermonuclear, but something nearly as bad, and that he was riding the light rail to the end of the line and was going to detonate it. I told the police officers and showed them the conversation and we all rushed to the end of the light rail line, which for some reason ended at the end of a hug parking lot somewhat near my house. The first train came that we thought he was on, but nothing happened. Then I saw something coming down this cable above the light rail, it slid into the tall parking garage, and then I saw my friend poking his head out. I started talking to him, and when I walked closer he was low enough for me to talk to. I tried to ask him if I could convince him out of it, and he said no. I looked at the device, it was at 14 seconds, but seemed to be going to quickly. I reached for him and he flinched back, I said that I just wanted to say good bye, I gave him a good hard hug, and then asked him once more if he was sure he wouldn’t like to give up. He said no, I remember looking at him beseechingly and the counter going to 3 and starting to run away and looking back one time and him not saying anything. Amazingly in those 3 seconds, I managed to get in the car which Jason had running, and we drove like crazy, probably managed to get about a mile away, which was near this huge bridge, but a few blocks before we got there, we heard this loud boom. Anyways, we end up near this bridge and I guess we crashed (fell asleep), I remember waking up the next morning and seeing my dad near the bridge talking to some coworkers, I guess about construction, even though he doesn’t do that…weird. I walked up to him and he said hey, and I said, “well, this is what you get when you piss off a gay person who is smart. That guy last night was a friend of mine”. The next part is fuzzy, we walked into an area with tile and a water cooler and some guy was coming out of the toilet. The next thing I remember was we were running through a residential area, back towards home, because I was worried about my mom. We got blocked by this house and started to run through it, and finally found the back after running into this room, that had soem guy and the mom off of malcolm in the middle. She said that she was sorry, and it sounded like she knew me. I told her that it was a friend of mine that had done it. She looked at me sadly, then handed me an envelope and said that it was to help me out. I could tell it had money in it. I asked her how wide the blast radius was, and she said 50 rows…of houses, I guess. I remember going out the back door of her house, and then I woke up. Weird

Ok, so I’ll have to apologize, to who…I don’t know, since I don’t think anyone reads this anyways. But, just in case, I haven’t written in here in a while and I felt I should update everyone.

This week was kinda blah…I started getting sick last Saturday and it progressed and I took Monday and Tuesday off. Then everyday I came back, I came in late…9 or 9:30, kinda sad, but I still managed to get my work done and that’s all that my boss is interested in.

Ugh, so I was annoyed Thursday and Friday since it was raining hard on Thursday, and sprinkling a bit here and there on Friday. I hate rain….after it’s ok, I guess, but the smell is weird sometimes, and the fact that I have to rewash the car totally sucks.

I am happy though, because we went bin crazy, and totally bought a bunch of bins from Target and started packing everything in them. Now the living room is packed with bins, but on the plus side, we’re almost finished with packing…yay. Speaking of which, we finally dropped off the money order for the deposit, at which time we found out, that the first and second months rent were due when we moved in. I figured no problem, since it was only 100 or so dollars for the first month, and then the second month, so I’d write them a check and ask them not to cash it until the 30th when I got paid….WRONG!!! Money order only…so I was scrambling for money, worried that I’d have to borrow more money from my friends or….god forbid….my parents. Not that they’d mind and all, but with my little brother just buying a MR2 Spyder, I’m not in the mood to look like the poor son that needs money. But I’ll bitch about him some other day. Oh, and in the process of discussing moving in, the lady just NOW figures out that I’m moving in on Thanksgiving, even though it’d been mentioned before….well….their office isn’t open on Thanksgiving, so she asks me if I’d like to move in one day later…why of course I would, I’m moving out on the 28th, I’ll just keep my stuff on the street until they open…retard. So, I have to move in on the 27th…tack on another $28 to the tab…now I’m freaking because I have to come up with 952 before 27th. I go to work and find out about our salary advance program…but it’s a hardship program. I explain my situation and my personnel person says that I can submit it and that there is a good chance that it’ll get approved. So I submit it, and ask how long it’ll take, and she makes it sound like a few days, but not too long. So around 3 I get a call and it’s her, I’ve been approved…I’m totally stoked, no worrying about asking mom or dad or acting like some big burden on my friends. Cool….I love my work…=)

Anyways, I’m audi now, time to go wash the car after all this rain and continue packing….Today ornamental shit from the walls is coming down…mwahahahaaaa….

Cya